Relationships can be our greatest teachers. We can find learning opportunities in all our relationships—whether family, friends or lovers. Rather than stress over challenging relationships, we can shift our perspective. Intimate connections offer us a glimpse into the darker sides of our personality that we may not always want to see.
For instance, if you constantly feel let down by others there’s a strong chance you’re letting yourself down in some way. Or if you feel judged by people close to you, you probably have some deep-rooted judgment that you’ve placed upon yourself. When we are open to seeing our relationships as assignments for personal growth, then we can begin to appreciate even the toughest times.
Navigating tumultuous relationships can be tough without a road map. To help you out, I’ve outlined three powerful relationship tools from my newest book Miracles Now. These three tools help you see your part, learn from your mistakes and release negative attachments.
Step 1: Take care of your side of the street.
The first step to healing a difficult relationship is to see your part in the chaos. Make a list of all the ways you’ve participated in the drama. Be specific and honest when writing them down.
Then once you’ve clarified your part, it’s very helpful to share it with the other person. Whether you send a letter, call them or meet face-to-face, take the time to acknowledge how you’ve been participating in the problems. This step is not an exercise in making yourself a punching bag. Rather, it’s an opportunity to make amends for whatever you’ve done wrong.
Step 2: Talk it out.
There is nothing more powerful than speaking your truth. This tool was taught to me by my friend Elena Brower, a world-renowned coach and yoga teacher. This exercise is